Action-Oriented Therapist in Philadelphia
For Women Struggling with Low Libido and Intimacy
Therapist in Philadelphia for Women Facing Low Libido and Intimacy Issues
Your relationship is great… except for your low libido and the constant stress of intimacy. And it’s not that you don’t want to have sex, it’s that you want to want to have sex. But how confusing is that and how the hell do you communicate that to your partner?? It doesn’t even really make sense to you.
So you’re stuck in a lose-lose situation where you avoid sex because it feels like a chore, but then feel so guilty and like you're neglecting the person you love most But you’re not the problem, and you’re NOT broken—there’s a reason. It’s time you had someone in your corner to help so you don’t have to keep feeling exhausted trying to get your love life back on track.
You’re not alone—And you’re not broken. But you ARE ready for a change.
Why You’re Here: Struggling with Low Libido in a Committed Relationship?
“Why don’t I want it like I used to? Is something wrong with me?”
“Every time he touches me, I cringe because I’m never in the mood and worry that any touch might lead to more so I have to shut it down…”
“I feel so guilty saying ‘no’ all the time and know he feels rejected but I just can’t. What if he gives up and stops trying?”
These questions are constantly in the back of your mind, especially after yet another night of pretending to be asleep and subtly scootching away when he comes to bed. You used to love seeing that look in his eyes and feeling him wrap his arms around you, but now any affection feels like pressure, and you’re worried if you give an inch, he’ll take a mile because you say no all the time and you know this is weighing on him (and you). Because deep down you worry it’s only a matter of time before he gives up because you can feel his frustration with you growing.
Why does sex feel like an effing chore?
But you also feel the distance growing because, if we’re being honest, every time he tries to have sex, you resent him because it’s so hard for you to get in the mood, sex feels like an effing chore, and this seems so easy for him. So, this sparks all those harsh thoughts about how you’re afraid you’re broken, you’re terrified this will destroy your relationship, and how you feel hopeless to fix this because you don’t even know where to start. It’s… a lot right now.
This is a cycle so many women find themselves in.
And we struggle alone. You love your partner and have a great relationship, but your low libido has become that one thing that’s blocking that easy, fun connection you had in the past. It’s like a constant black cloud hanging over your relationship. And no, it’s not because “you’re the problem” or “you’re broken”—the main issue isn’t even a low libido problem (wtf, I know, hear me out). The problem is your body’s overactivated hormonal response to stress and pressure. Your low libido and low desire are just signs your body’s on overdrive, and that’s why you can’t get in the mood no matter how hard you try. Because your stress hormones are blocking your body’s ability to release arousal hormones. And the fix is easier than you think, but you need a different approach.
My Approach: Direct, Action-Focused Therapy that Gets Results
Erinn Hoel, Therapist in Philadelphia
I’m Erinn, a Therapist in Philadelphia and I can help!
I’m Erinn Hoel, an intimacy coach and sex therapist in Philadelphia, and I help women struggling with low libido stop feeling like sex is a chore, break through the stress of this, and transform intimacy so they can feel confident in their relationships and let go of the fear and guilt that has held them back for so long.
Your life is “good on paper” but you’ve lost that loving feelin’ you used to feel in the early, exciting days of your relationship, and you’re afraid of what will happen to that good life if you can’t figure this out.
Here’s the thing: None of this is your fault and you’re not broken.
The reason you’re struggling is because no one taught you the skills you need to be successful (I’m looking at you, disappointing sex ed). Instead, you were taught a bunch of unhelpful sexpectations (expectations about sex) like sex drive “just happens” (no, this is false) so you’re used to thinking about what your sex life “should” be like, instead of considering what you want it to be like. When we work together, we’ll get you the skills and strategies you need to get back on track so intimacy feels fun again—not like another task on your never-ending to-do list.
I get it, talking to a stranger about sex doesn’t usually come naturally
I promise I’ll make it as comfortable as possible. I joke, swear, and ask a lot of questions, and encourage you to do the same because it’s important we be ourselves and have some fun along the way. Getting your groove back doesn’t have to be scary, it just feels like that right now because you’re trying to go it alone and being really hard on yourself. Instead, let me be in your corner so I can help you let your guard down, start trusting yourself more, and thrive in your relationship again.
Click here to schedule your free 15-min phone call for sexy therapy in Philadelphia today.
Ready to Get Real About Change? Book a Free 15-Minute Call to Discuss Your Needs and How We’ll Tackle Them Together.
Talk to someone about my sex life? What?!
Starting this conversation can feel like the hardest part, which is why I offer a free, no-pressure 15-minute call. It’s a simple way to get to know each other, talk about what’s been going on, and see how I can best support you in taking those first steps toward a stronger, closer, more enjoyable connection with your partner.
Hesitant to book a call? Of course, you are because this shit can be scary! But here’s why you should:
Get Support: We’ll talk about what’s really going on for you and where you’re stuck. Just knowing you’re not alone works wonders, because you can do this, you just need some support right now because no one taught you the skills you need to do this.
Finally Get Relief: Based on your needs, you’ll get an individualized plan of how to move forward. No more panic Googling at 1 am trying to fix your relationship.
Get Unstuck: Starting really is the hardest part. By scheduling a call, you’ve already started the ball rolling, making the momentum to keep moving forward much easier, all by just having a short convo with me.
This is just a phone call—no commitments, no awkward first “session.” Just a real conversation about where you’re at and how I can help.
Book Your Free 15-Min Call Here
FAQs About Therapy in Philadelphia
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Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT). These types of interventions explore how your thoughts influence your behaviors, and how your behaviors influence your thoughts.
Wild, I know. But these techniques help you feel back in control and can be so, so effective.
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Think about the most pressing issue you want to address and start there, because it can be overwhelming to try to work on everything at once.
Look for a provider with experience in the main area you want to address and take advantage of jumping on a free intro call first (if available) to make sure you feel comfortable and like it’s a good fit. Just chatting with someone can help you get a better feel of what it would be like to be in the room with them.
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If you’ve been struggling with an issue for longer than a month or two and it’s causing a lot of stress in your life, therapy may be a better option. Therapy provides longer-term support while you build up skills so you can better navigate tough feelings and situations as they arise.
However, counseling might be a better fit for you if you need help navigating a short-term stressful situation that isn’t causing day-to-day distress.
My Services: Personalized Support From Philadelphia Therapist
Your Path to Fixing Low Lidibo:
The Desire to Fire Method
Ready to get real about change?
Book your free 15-Min call to discuss your needs and how we’ll tackle them together.
If you’re ready for a love life without the guilt, resentment, and one that no longer feels like a chore so that you can start enjoying quality time together again, click here to schedule a free 15-minute intro call or call 484-854-3866.
Got questions? Don’t we all! Click here to check out FAQs or here to contact me.
My specialties include low libido, low desire, differential desires, stress and sex, communication and sexual communication, relationship intimacy, building sexual pleasure, and increasing connection and teamwork in relationships.